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No wonder you don't work for Tesla anymore, your attitude tells me everything I need to know that you aren't up to the standards of the people I've met that work for them.
If you use this aftermarket adapter, make sure you turn down the amperage to 24 amps on your car at every new location it's used at (it should remember the location if used at the same place)
Dashboard for Tesla looks to have Android Wear Support, though it doesn't work with the Galaxy Watch which runs Tizen: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.sg57.tesladashboard
I think you under estimate the knowledge thieves have. Internet videos explaining how to do it, high end vehicle which likely have high end contents, it takes 5 seconds, no breaking glass sound...