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10+ minutes to start my "old" tesla is just an inconvenience b/c I chose to do the eMMC recall and install firmware updates

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If you have pearl-clutching safety concerns, then take matters into your own hands and either fix or sell the car. Seems pretty simple. This isn’t something to rely on someone else for.

If you think you have a claim against Tesla then pay for the upgrade and seek reimbursement in small claims like @gearchruncher did, there’s a good shot you’ll win.
Not my car, thank god. Why have a car you can’t depend on in a crunch? Definition agree with you the OP should get rid of it for something reliable.
 
1) Pay for the infotainment upgrade.

2) Sue Tesla in small claims court for reimbursement. No lawyer necessary.

This is good advice as long as you have opted out of the arbitration clause. I didn't, to my chagrin. I'm never making that mistake again.

Edited to add: I think "pearl-clutching" is a little uncalled-for. IMO there's a reasonable case to be made that there are safety concerns, although my own reasoning goes more like (at least in my case, before I ate the upgrade cost and made the problem go away), (a) the car can be put in gear and driven while the MCU is still floundering, but (b) the reverse cam doesn't come on. Rear viz sucks without the reverse cam. The net of (a) + (b) is that there's an increased risk of something bad happening while you're reversing, if this were not true there wouldn't even need to be a reverse cam, so it shouldn't really be up for debate.

This reminds me that I should get around to filing a NHTSA report and maybe writing a letter to my state AG, for whatever good it'll do me. (None, that's what, but maybe it'll do somebody some good.)
 
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And they don’t actively heat/cool the battery in standby in moderate climates.
For the Model S, won't range mode kill this? Not totally sure this works in Standby like it does when driving, but you think it would.

Lately, for extended driving (cruising), I have had to turn on range mode to keep a reasonable level of range in my 2016 Model X. It made about a 10% improvement. That is even with preconditioning the cabin with Range Mode off and plugged in.
 
Looking harder, this doesn’t seem to be the case for the Extended Service Agreement, which is what my claim would be under. I still ought to (and will) pursue the claim though.
What ended up happening? Did you pay out of pocket for mcu2 upgrade even while having the esa where they could have been nice and charged you the $200 deductible for the new mcu2. Shame on Tesla, most people already paid $5,000 for that esa.
 
What ended up happening? Did you pay out of pocket for mcu2 upgrade even while having the esa where they could have been nice and charged you the $200 deductible for the new mcu2. Shame on Tesla, most people already paid $5,000 for that esa.
I did pay out of pocket. And (shame on me) I still haven't pursued every escalation path I could, in order to be reimbursed. I haven't given up on it but now the the problem is fixed, the urgency is reduced and so it keeps getting shuffled back...
 
I did pay out of pocket. And (shame on me) I still haven't pursued every escalation path I could, in order to be reimbursed. I haven't given up on it but now the the problem is fixed, the urgency is reduced and so it keeps getting shuffled back...
Since as others have pointed out that the mcu1 controls critical safety items it should be covered under esa. For example I couldn’t use my turn signals recently. I hope you get it figured out and reimbursed.
 
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Since as others have pointed out that the mcu1 controls critical safety items it should be covered under esa. For example I couldn’t use my turn signals recently. I hope you get it figured out and reimbursed.
You mean the screen should work when you touch it? Without upgrading to a $1750 radio less unit?
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