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April fools joke: "Star"

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by vfx, Apr 1, 2008.

  1. vfx

    vfx Well-Known Member

    Aug 18, 2006
    CA CA
    Living up to it's name.

    Tesla Motors has signed an exclusive agreement with a Brackistani company that has the only fusion meteor on the planet. The 6-pound hunk of a White Dwarf Star fell to earth in the remote region in May of 2006. It was found when a local farmer’s goats flock would gather around a natural quartz outcropping where the heat generating stone had plummeted from it’s exploding host, a terminal White hot Dwarf star, an estimated 3 trillion light years away. Despite it’s long journey the mini meteor still puts out a non-radioactive power intensity equal to roughly 50 nuclear reactors. All attempts to pick it up instantly burned the sticks, metal tongs and stones that were tried by the farmer and other locals. Hhaftigan Technoligies a local Brackistani think-tank managed to move the white-hot object to it’s lab using Silica blocks similar to the tile found on the space shuttle and massive amounts of surface cooling water from a nearby stream. “Usually these “star chunks” hit the soil or ocean and burn their way to the earth’s core where they combine with cooling magma to plug their entry holes. This one found the perfect spot where the quartz bed was not only strong enough to withstand the impact but also dissipate the tremendous heat. When we arrived it was swaddled in a bowl so it simply crackled and pops like water on a hot skillet”, says Gabibeeb Hhaftigan chief energy scientist at the facility.

    Amazing energy from infinitesimal bits
    Laboratory tests show that chips off the rock smaller that the head of a pin could power a single family home for at least 100 years, perhaps longer. Seeing potential in the field of transportation, silicone startup Tesla Motors has signed an exclusive deal for all land-based transportation energy that comes from the star-rock. Tesla sees harnessing tiny bits of the star to power a range of vehicles that will include their pending “Whitestar” and future cars from the California Company. The deal includes buses, trains, and two wheel vehicles but no word from the company about any product line expansion.
    In a press release from Tesla Motors, CEO Ze'ev Drori states, “This landmark agreement fits perfectly in line with Tesla’s goal of clean transportation and cutting edge technology. Appropriately the Whitestar will be the first star powered car of any kind and will position us the leader in clean, space borne energy.

    Why Tesla?
    There are rumors that the farmer who owns 49 percent of the star-rock and Hhaftigan Labs who owns the balance were both under the impression that the car company was related to the local hero inventor of the same name from nearby Croatia. Neither party has returned our requests for a statement.
  2. GSP

    GSP Member

    Dec 28, 2007
    White Dwarf Star Density

    That 6 lb chuck of a white dwarf would be the size of a cube about 1.4 mm on each side.

    Had it been a neutron star, it would have only been 0.0014 mm on each side!

    Reality is stranger than fiction.

  3. doug

    doug Administrator / Head Moderator

    Nov 28, 2006
    Stanford, California
    Well if we're really gonna be sticklers about it.... The only reason the density is so high is because of the extremely high gravity holding it together. If, for sake of argument, you were able to instantly transport 1 mm^3 of the material to somewhere on the surface of the earth, it wouldn't stay 1 mm^3 for long.

    Also most calculations of the size of the universe say it to be around 50 billion lightyears, though some estimate up to 160 billion lightyears. Anyhow, much smaller than 3 trillion lightyears.

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