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Three things went wrong with my first carwash yesterday.
Like buying insurance, having the Model 3 washed was one of the things I never looked forward to and put off as long as possible. I took delivery on July 2, and this was my first carwash. I have three more days left before not having insured the car becomes an issue.
I asked the guy who takes the cars in if they know about Teslas. Yes, yes, he said, and did I leave the key card? Encouraged, I did.
They drove the car onto the self moving line and left it in park or perhaps in autohold. Horribly, the car started bucking up as the rollers came up from behind and failed to move it. The rollers then went under and came out from under the front wheel, bumping the car up momentarily. Did it three times before a guy who knew how to drive a Tesla chased the guy who didn't. Don't know if any permanent damage was done, but my heart broke every time. I just about jumped out onto the wash line.
The second bad thing was no fault of washers or Tesla (I think), but as the towel guy finished drying her off, I pointed out some spots on the hood. He put some extra Simple Green, or what do they use, and wiped it clean, but the spots didn't come off. He called the guy who spoke English, who explained that it is bird sh!t and nothing can be done as paint is already damaged. Weird, because the car has always been garaged at home and at work, and on a few occasions where it sat for a few hours out in a park, I did not notice any splats on it other than the steadily growing layer of dust. I still don't know and may never know where the spots came from. There are three in all, one toward the center of the hood, two on the edge nearest the windshield. They are only noticeable in certain light from a certain angle, and they have a smooth wavy texture to them as if the paint, indeed, were damaged. The shape of the spots is that of a splat, consistent with the expert opinion of the carwash guy. But splats of what? And when? For all I know they may have been there from day one and I only noticed them when I looked closely for the quality of the wash/dry, but not when I took delivery.
Other than that, because the wash uses soft hanging stripes, not bristles, no damage to the paint and, as far as I know, none to the cameras or radars.
The third bad thing came up as I opened the door, and then the other three doors. There was water on the inside of the door frame. Yes, I know, high powered wash and all, but this has not happened to my two German cars I take there. I made a show of drying the door frames with their towel I found in a bin and did not even ask for half of my $2 tip back. I am sure they would have felt terrible, but they already moved on to the next car.
Needless to say, no more automatic washes for me. I will either invest in a two bucket rinseless system or pay the guys who wash the cars by hand at the office.
Some of what you've brought up are the exact reasons that car enthusiasts never go to these places. I would even go as far as to recommend never going to a do-it-yourself hand wash place because who knows what PSI the sprayers are set to. You're putting your car's safety in the hands of other people or machines. With an expensive vehicle, all it takes is one bad mishap to make your entire habit of going to carwashes not worth it.
Even starting from my very first new vehicle, which was a 2006 Honda Civic, I always hand washed the car myself. If you sponge wash your self, there is no need to ever have high pressure washes potentially marring up your paint.
If you must take it to a car wash, go to a hand car wash where there is virtually no automation.
I have always used basically the same products on all my cars I've ever owned:
Car wash sponge, something like:
https://www.amazon.com/Viking-42401...id=1533083741&sr=1-4&keywords=car+wash+sponge
Meguiar's Gold Class
The absorber for drying:
https://www.amazon.com/CleanTools-3...coding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=51FQ75FE3J71RDY3EDX8
And that's it. I don't worry about wax as I pay close attention to my clear coat, and i've typically hand clayed my clear coat myself every 6 months or so:
https://www.amazon.com/Mothers-0724...&qid=1533083880&sr=1-1&keywords=meguiars+clay
Use those products and make a habit of cleaning your own car, and you'll never worry. If you don't want to do it yourself, take it to a reputable hand wash. Look up reviews.