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Best way to incorporate "concealed" radar and laser detector functionality

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We are eagerly awaiting our P85D in October (So glad they added the lighter colored leather option AND 19" tires so we can finalize our order!) but we are now looking into how we can install the best laser and radar detector coverage available. These are our requirements and we'd love to hear any possible solutions and idea of cost.

+ No visible cords anywhere.
+ Must include front and rear coverage for radar and laser.
+ Must not interfere with Autopilot radar
+ I suppose sensors will have to be outside the car so as to not have issued with the coated glass
+ System needs to look discrete and blend in with the interior with audible and visual (lights?) alerts
+ Ability to easily turn the entire system off
+ Interface with GPS and an automatically updated speed camera database would also be nice.

+ Jamming functionality is also quite desirable but not required -- Preferably a system that disables the jamming feature automatically after 5 seconds allowing you to reduce your speed before they get a reading! What I heard you don't want to do is keep jamming acquisitions as they will put two and two together. I heard what you should do is start slowing down immediately and then let them lock onto you at a lower speed. Discrete way to turn off the jamming feature and ideally the jamming feature working as a rudimentary parking assist radar so you can always claim that you use the system for as a parking aid :)

Would be awesome if the alerts are received on the instrument cluster but that would take deep integration with the Tesla software.

So, what are our options?

PS: Just noticed the radar typo on the subject line. I already edited the subject but the old one still shows...
 
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@MsElectric
check out PASSPORT 8500ci Plus Custom Installed Radar Detector- Escort Inc.
The 8500ci Plus sensors fit behind the nosecone. Not sure at this point if they function with the MS forward facing radar and all the other sensors now up front. The display and controls fit in the cubby below the center display. If you really do want jamming, then look at the 9500ci. Expensive, but they have a lot of features to them. I am getting a quote next week. I have seen the 8500ci below $800 not including the installation.
 
I'm also very interested in this topic. As randompersonx mentioned, the Escort Passport 9500ci and Beltronics STIR+ (both siblings, around the 1.5-2K range) are both tried and true, and seem to meet all of your criteria. There is are several threads discussing & comparing the two here on TMC-- here is one.

There is a new detector out called the Stinger VIP that I'm drooling over, but the 5K price tag is rather off-putting.

For now I'm going to keep my tried-and-true V1 mounted on the windshield or visor, at least until the verdict on the Stinger is in from new adopters.

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Of course the ultimate solution would be for radar sensors and laser shifters to integrate directly with the Tesla head unit. Many modern radar antennas and laser shifters use standard USB connections. If the Tesla system really is opened up to third party integrations/extensions/apps (as Elon has promised in the past) I see this as a real possibility. Imagine using the vehicle GPS to mark false alarms and pull in red light camera databases over the cellular connection or WiFi!
 
I did this with the Bel STiR and Laser Blinders

Did the install almost two years ago. The radar display was embedded in the rear view mirror with the control switch vertically mounted (on the inside left) in the pocket below the screen - my hand falls there very naturally. Laser blinders were mounted front and rear by the license plates. If you are near NYC talk to Gus at Technik 1 on West 48th Street.
 
There are 2 or 3 companies that make small laser deflecting heads that should be easy to integrate into the Model S. They tend to cost around $2500 installed. A good radar detector might be around $1500 and if you want a mirror display for it (very stealthy) you will probably need to add $700. So none of this comes cheaply, but the piece of mind of knowing if your speed is being monitored is worth it to me.
I would get on Porsche, Mercedes, and BMW forums to find out the best installers in your area. I have had good luck with stores that specialize in customization and also mobile installers.
 
I've got the Beltronics STi-R with laser shifters. The sensors are all placed behind the grille, just under the nosecone. The GPS antenna is magnetized to the metal bumper just behind the nosecone. As for the display and buttons, I made a little frame for it and have it in the cubby. There's at least one big thread about this somewhere.
 
I've been a V1 user for a long long time, but it seems that it won't be possible to use in the Model S due to the metalic film in the windows.

After reading about the STi-R vs 9500CI, I think the STi-R is the better way to go, because of KA band segmentation. This feature can greatly reduce the delay for warning on KA, while at the same time reducing falses. V1 calls this feature "Custom Sweeps", and it is very worthwhile.

I'm not sure how good the STi-R laser shifters are -- and I know there are other products out there which specialize in just this feature alone.

There's also a big open question of if the STi-R has a "Traffic Radar" filtering feature, in order to filter out the K-Band radar from the new Autopilot feature.
 
I've been a V1 user for a long long time, but it seems that it won't be possible to use in the Model S due to the metalic film in the windows.

After reading about the STi-R vs 9500CI, I think the STi-R is the better way to go, because of KA band segmentation. This feature can greatly reduce the delay for warning on KA, while at the same time reducing falses. V1 calls this feature "Custom Sweeps", and it is very worthwhile.

I'm not sure how good the STi-R laser shifters are -- and I know there are other products out there which specialize in just this feature alone.

There's also a big open question of if the STi-R has a "Traffic Radar" filtering feature, in order to filter out the K-Band radar from the new Autopilot feature.

The laser shifters have saved me a few times. You just need to be quick to hit the brakes AND double-tap the mute button to disable the shifters at the same time.
It's paid for itself at least once over.
 
I bought a used Bell STI-R Plus with laser shifters on ebay for $900. I bench tested it, and it all seems to work well, although I haven't had it installed yet. In the mean time, on longer trips, I have used my trusty V1, which provides front and rear laser alerts and rear radar alert, but no front radar detection, which arguably one needs the most. But it's still better than nothing.
 
I put the display in my rear view mirror. This is in my G37. I'm hoping to get the Tesla in a few months.
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