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Driving Cross Country Female + 2 Dogs

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Modern tires that are not worn out and have enough air in them are rather dependable. I would not bother with a spare or a patch kit unless you have practiced and comfortable using them. In the unlikely event you have a problem roadside assistance is usually fast and safe. A couple days ago wife ran over a chunk of metal that tore a good size hole in her tire (first time in 25,000 miles) and roadside assistance had her home with a new tire on in an hour. Sure occasionally there are longer delays but most likely nothing will happen and if something does you will probably get it resolved in a couple hours.
 
My personal experience from taking a number of solo road trips in our S: (Bear in mind that I am male and well into my seventh decade, so your experiences may be different, and I did not travel with our canine companions! :))

I have found that more frequent, but shorter Supercharging stops allow for a more relaxing drive. Instead of charging to 85-90% and driving for close to four hours while bypassing a couple of locations, I would charge to 65-70% and stop after two-plus hours or so. With the rapid filling of the M3 battery, by the time you use the restroom if needed, give your doggies a short walk about to let them stretch their legs and do their business, give them a treat and a drink of water, you will have spent < 20 minutes and should be good to return to the road.

You can use the energy graph in the trip tab to see your estimated arrival battery percentage before you unplug. You can then flip between Supercharger destinations to see if you want to drive a 220-mile leg before stopping, or instead stop about halfway for a short charge and a stretch. You might want to start with a 20% reserve at your destination, and can reduce it to 15% or so once you are comfortable with your driving style and outside influences like wind or rain. Just keep your eye on the reserve periodically, and you won't have any anxiety.

Remember that the further west you drive, the hotter the weather will be (at least the humidity will be approaching zero, unlike Jersey.) In addition, the Superchargers are spaced a lot further apart once you are west of the Mississippi on I80, I70, or I10 if taking the southern route.)

Destination chargers at restaurants or hotels are a good way to kill two birds with one stone, but always call ahead to verify that they are working.

This is not a race, nor is it a test to maximize efficiency and charging stops. It should be a relaxed journey with your dogs, perhaps seeing parts of the United States that you haven't seen before. You will gain all the experience that you need to solve your charging questions as you drive.

Have fun, be safe, and welcome to California! (The Central Valley is going to hit 108 degrees Wednesday and Thursday. But it is a dry heat!)