I think you need to check two cars charging at the same time, at paired stalls. You will see what
@David99 is talking about. The charger power is not changing in 12kW steps, rather, it changes in 36kW steps. Your point about wasting charger remaining power is valid. That's why urban chargers are created - they just reduce waste and increase total throughput in very crowded situations.
Re; demand charges, it's not cheap. In fact, at least in Japan demand charges is the biggest reason to cap the total charging site power.
For example, in Tokyo;
業務用電力(契約電力500kW未満)|電気料金プラン 高圧・特別高圧|東京電力エナジーパートナー株式会社
Less than 500kW contract. 15.5 USD per kW of demand charges. That means with 135kW Tesla superchargers for four stalls, total power 270kW, so 4185 USD. Electricity cost is not included. Large sites like shopping centers and large buildings with superchargers typically have single high voltage feed and single contract, so the owners estimate peak electricity demand (like in summer heat) and try NOT to exceed planned kW, by turning off AC in some areas etc. In Japan superchargers are actually power limited in hotels if the hotel is using too much power on that day.
Many Japanese DCFCs in shopping centers also reduce power in summer.
How many months do you have to keep the demand charges in the US? In Japan it's one year - so once you get to the peak, you keep paying for that peak rate for a year from that date. In the 4185 USD case you need to pay 4185 USD x 12 months = 50220 USD in demand charges annually.