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How to convince a wife that a tesla is a great addition to my garage?

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#41
gglockner said:
An internet discussion forum isn't a good place for marriage counseling. The Model S is a fantastic car. But if you need to make a big effort to rationalize buying one, then it's probably not the right time to buy one.
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Marriage counseling wasn't what i was looking for or need. I was looking for advice on how others have approached their significant others when it comes to spending a great deal of money on a luxury car. Bottom line is we (wife and I) come from very different backgrounds, spending money for her isn't as easy as it is for me. We both earn good salaries, her focus is saving as much as she can and saving for our children's future, which is an absolute must. Over the years because of my workload she has handled all the finances and as such laid the financial plans, I am the one throwing a spanner in the works with my desires. Therefore I was looking for advice on if others are/were in similar situations and how they were able to lay it out in a way that made financial sense to their partner, bottom line it probably doesn't and therefore I just need to work with her on fitting in my needs into the current plan, it will probably take longer to get the car and thats something I will just have to deal with and be patient. I guess the silver lining is that there could be some new options in 2014.

Thanks
 
#42
gglockner said:
An internet discussion forum isn't a good place for marriage counseling. The Model S is a fantastic car. But if you need to make a big effort to rationalize buying one, then it's probably not the right time to buy one.
Click to expand...

Probably overthinking the OP's request or projecting. Let's take it at face value.

- - - Updated - - -

Brittt1 said:
Marriage counseling wasn't what i was looking for or need. I was looking for advice on how others have approached their significant others when it comes to spending a great deal of money on a luxury car. Bottom line is we (wife and I) come from very different backgrounds, spending money for her isn't as easy as it is for me.
Click to expand...

Was similar for me with my (now) ex. He used to try to rationalize a purchase. I'd just look at him, roll my eyes, and say, "Just tell me you WANT it. Quit trying to make it sound like a good investment."

Good luck. :)
 
#43
I'm like a few others in the post, I just bought it and then told her.

Here was my evil thinking: I told her NOT to buy her last car (Honda minivan) and she bought it anyways; that gave me Carte Blanche to buy whatever I wanted!
Which was actually a S550, after less than 18 months I traded my S550 for the MS85 (which I just traded up to a P85 after 4 months).

After typing this out; sounds like I need to join Car Buyers Anonymous (Hi I'm Ken, and I can't stop buying great cars!)
 
#44
i was actually in a very similar place when i first started trying to justify the purchase to my wife. (Although I live in Herndon, not Falls Church - the rest of your initial post could have been from me). My wife isn't a car person (and now that we have it, she does like to drive it more than her car, but i haven't been in danger of losing it to her - she looks at the car as an instrument for getting from point a to point b), so the performance and the fun driving it (and even going on a test drive) weren't big selling points for her.

The safety rating was nice, and the gas savings, but at the end of the day, it was really just something I wanted... the only thing she really cared about was whether we could get it without totally disrupting our finances. When we worked through the budget, and i was able to show that it wasn't going to impact our kids college funds, or our retirement savings, or the ability to put food on the table *grin*, she was more on board. I made some choices to stop going to starbucks every morning, bring lunch instead of buy at work... that plus the difference in gas (and the fact that i was in the market for a car anyway) was enough to make it a reasonable stretch for us without seriously impacting other things. That was the best sell for my wife...

Tempus
 
#45
You can't rationalize the Model S based on economics - other fine, efficient cars are much more economical. Buying a Model S is something you do because you like the car or you want to reduce your use of oil. After you have handled more important financial obligations.
 
#46
I'm with gglockner, you can't make a very good cost savings/financial argument when compared to a Volt or a good hybrid like the Prius or Plug In Prius. You have to go with environment and quality of life argument. Two of the things I do not miss about NoVa (moved away in 1999) are grocery store lines and gas station lines. Wouldn't it be nice to never have to battle your way through a gas station again? What's the value on that?

In regards to 60 v 85, do not hesitate to get the 85. You'll want the Model S to be your road trip car, as it is in my family, and that's much more difficult in the 60. Tell your wife you got the 60 though, so she doesn't think you spent as much money.
 
#49
JohnQ said:
Never, ever, lie about anything to your wife … except when she asks about her weight or a dress.
Click to expand...

sranger said:
Best advise so far...
Click to expand...

ANY time a significant other asks you about their weight, physique, hair (or lack of) or any other 'how they look' question, a positive answer is the only right answer. It's not a lie if you love them as they are.
 
#51
Tempus said:
i was actually in a very similar place when i first started trying to justify the purchase to my wife. (Although I live in Herndon, not Falls Church - the rest of your initial post could have been from me). My wife isn't a car person (and now that we have it, she does like to drive it more than her car, but i haven't been in danger of losing it to her - she looks at the car as an instrument for getting from point a to point b), so the performance and the fun driving it (and even going on a test drive) weren't big selling points for her.

The safety rating was nice, and the gas savings, but at the end of the day, it was really just something I wanted... the only thing she really cared about was whether we could get it without totally disrupting our finances. When we worked through the budget, and i was able to show that it wasn't going to impact our kids college funds, or our retirement savings, or the ability to put food on the table *grin*, she was more on board. I made some choices to stop going to starbucks every morning, bring lunch instead of buy at work... that plus the difference in gas (and the fact that i was in the market for a car anyway) was enough to make it a reasonable stretch for us without seriously impacting other things. That was the best sell for my wife...

Tempus
Click to expand...

Totally a similar situation, Starbucks and all. We spend $12 a day plus on Starbucks when I have Starbucks in my office, I didn't think about that. That's like $350 a month right there.
 
#56
Funny, I was in a similar situation myself, right down to Falls Church and 2 kids. One difference is I was already in the market for a $30-50k sport sedan (to replace an 8-year-old Mazda wagon) when I became aware of the Model S. My wife is also generally quite frugal, and her initial reaction was there's no way we'd get such an expensive car. Frankly, my initial thought was the same. But I got her to agree to go on a test drive, just to satisfy my curiosity.

The part that might be surprising to many here is that although I was completely blown away by the initial test drive, she was merely OK with it, and to this day she isn't all that excited about the car and is hesitant to drive it. But she does like it; obviously she ultimately agreed that we could swing it financially; and now it's our primary car, even for road trips. It took us both about a month to get ourselves comfortable with the idea of buying a Model S.

I ran the numbers vs. a $50K ICE. We both commute but don't drive a ton (under 10k miles/year each) so the MS still ended up more expensive, but not by as much as we had thought it would. And she did give me a hard time when gas prices dipped after my MS was delivered... :)

Last but not least, I think reading all the details of the 5-star safety rating has helped my wife feel a lot better about the purchase.

Good luck!
 
#57
I think I was able to convince my wife because at first I was looking for a genuine midlife-crisis sports car (leaning heavily towards a Corvette, but researching some similarly fast, very cool looking and otherwise impractical cars), which she was not happy with at all, mainly because we have to schlep our kids and there stuff around everywhere for sports and other activities and she knew I would not really be able to do any of that with the cars I was considering, which meant we were probably going to wind up with 3 cars for the two of us. I got steered towards Tesla by some other events, and my wife was much happier with that choice. I don't think she even asked how much it was, so I haven't told her, but she thinks the one I'm buying is around $80k (which it was, before adding $20k of options).

I currently drive a 2006 Prius, have always driven very practical (and therefore slow and boring) cars and the most expensive car I (or we) had bought to date was our $40k 2006 Toyota Highlander Limited (which is her primary car and the one we take on road trips or to the airport when we have to load up with 4 large suitcases). We are not loaded but we're secure with income, employability, savings and investments, so she wasn't particularly worried about financial impact. I think the only lesson learned from my experience was to be fixated on something the wife would really be unhappy with and then change to something that is much better in comparison and it may be just enough to distract her from any doubts (the lesser of two evils)!
 
#59
Brittt1, from a financial standpoint, like a few have similarly describe, even though you make "high six figures", how is your net worth? Do you have lots of stuff and no savings to show for? You can be a doctor making $300K/yr with $600K of debt or a doctor making $300K/yr with only a mortgage and money saved in investments.

Did you pay off your Lincoln MKX? What you lose on selling the MKX isn't so important as its sale would help reduce the cost of your MS. I sold my Nissan 350Z months before clicking Confirm on my order to reduce my MS cost by $15K.

Having recently taken possession of a MS, it's more clear to me I don't have to buy gas, pay for oil changes, emissions test, or any fluids to top off in an ICE. I have a 1996 Jeep I bought new for winter driving that costs me almost $3K/yr in gas if it was my primary vehicle. Your MKX is probably costing you that much a year too. As I transition to driving the MS, I expect to save about $2K/yr.
 
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