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My Wife Doesn't Like Driving my Tesla -
- Thread starter lencap
- Start date
My wife also won't drive the S, despite the fact that she scheduled the test drive and wanted the car. She still continues to drive her beat-up 2002 Subaru. She knows how much I really enjoy the Tesla and just doesn't want to be responsible for damaging it. I encourage her to drive it. I say "It's there to be used," and "I won't be mad if anything happens," but she doesn't want to drive it. I wonder if OP's wife is really similar but doesn't want to say so.
PS: Kavygirl and I had our 25th wedding anniversary this week. One key to a happy marriage has been not pushing things like this.
PS: Kavygirl and I had our 25th wedding anniversary this week. One key to a happy marriage has been not pushing things like this.
Interesting perspectives from everyone. Thanks. Frankly I don't care if she likes the EV or not, I just want her to drive it more frequently so that if she HAS to use it she can do so effectively without being intimidated.
In terms of prior cars - we've been married nearly 50 years, owning everything from 2 seat sport cars to full size luxury cars. She is a very capable driver - easily controls manual transmission sports cars and drives them aggressively and well. She just doesn't seem to enjoy the Tesla - and if she doesn't enjoy a car she just avoids it. On the other hand when she finds a car she likes she keeps it until it dies. Her favorite car was a 1980 MB 300D bought new. She had that car for over 11 years, and would likely still have it, but it was totaled when a brand new teenage driver rammed her in the rear at a stop light. The new driver wasn't familiar with his dad's manual transmission jeep. Hit her at near full speed at a red light and the driver pushed in the clutch instead of the brake. Hit her so hard the rear trunk was in the back seat, and the sunroof popped open. Despite the damage the MB doors opened fully, and neither my wife or son had a mark on them.
I was hoping she'd like the Tesla for the safety features and NTSB accident ratings, along with the fun to drive element. She doesn't. She told me to "just buy another set of tires for the BMW and I'm fine." So I did. I admit her 335d is a lot of fun to drive - the torque is wonderful. It fits her like a glove (she's "petite" in stature), and as long as she's happy, so am I.
As an aside, she does have an Apple phone, and the Tesla app, but she isn't into technology much at all. She prefers paper and pen to electronic devices, reads real hard cover books instead of Kindles, and balances checkbooks by hand. That doesn't mean she's a technophobe, far from it, she's very competent with all Microsoft Office products, but she prefers not to use them if there is an alternative. (She still has accounting and graph paper supplies).
My post wasn't designed to change her mind, just trying to better understand if others have had "significant others" who don't like/want to drive Telsas, and how did you deal with it to the degree that if the need arose, the reluctant Tesla driver could use it like any other car.
In terms of prior cars - we've been married nearly 50 years, owning everything from 2 seat sport cars to full size luxury cars. She is a very capable driver - easily controls manual transmission sports cars and drives them aggressively and well. She just doesn't seem to enjoy the Tesla - and if she doesn't enjoy a car she just avoids it. On the other hand when she finds a car she likes she keeps it until it dies. Her favorite car was a 1980 MB 300D bought new. She had that car for over 11 years, and would likely still have it, but it was totaled when a brand new teenage driver rammed her in the rear at a stop light. The new driver wasn't familiar with his dad's manual transmission jeep. Hit her at near full speed at a red light and the driver pushed in the clutch instead of the brake. Hit her so hard the rear trunk was in the back seat, and the sunroof popped open. Despite the damage the MB doors opened fully, and neither my wife or son had a mark on them.
I was hoping she'd like the Tesla for the safety features and NTSB accident ratings, along with the fun to drive element. She doesn't. She told me to "just buy another set of tires for the BMW and I'm fine." So I did. I admit her 335d is a lot of fun to drive - the torque is wonderful. It fits her like a glove (she's "petite" in stature), and as long as she's happy, so am I.
As an aside, she does have an Apple phone, and the Tesla app, but she isn't into technology much at all. She prefers paper and pen to electronic devices, reads real hard cover books instead of Kindles, and balances checkbooks by hand. That doesn't mean she's a technophobe, far from it, she's very competent with all Microsoft Office products, but she prefers not to use them if there is an alternative. (She still has accounting and graph paper supplies).
My post wasn't designed to change her mind, just trying to better understand if others have had "significant others" who don't like/want to drive Telsas, and how did you deal with it to the degree that if the need arose, the reluctant Tesla driver could use it like any other car.
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If anything, my wife understands the car better than I do (she's a controls engineer). She likes how it drives and all and is the primary driver.
That said, she prefers driving her 2009 Honda Fit still. She won't drive it because of environmental reasons (why we got an EV) and she likes the Model 3 well enough, just really misses her Fit. And I get it. It's smaller and lighter and goes from point A to B just fine, and very efficiently. The Model 3 is much heavier, has worse visibility, isn't a hatchback, and random techy things break frequently (TACC, Bluetooth, USB charging) where she never had a single issue with the Fit.
If your SO must drive the Tesla at some point, it sounds like she already knows how to unlock and get it in drive. Beyond that, it's a car and drives like one would expect.
That said, she prefers driving her 2009 Honda Fit still. She won't drive it because of environmental reasons (why we got an EV) and she likes the Model 3 well enough, just really misses her Fit. And I get it. It's smaller and lighter and goes from point A to B just fine, and very efficiently. The Model 3 is much heavier, has worse visibility, isn't a hatchback, and random techy things break frequently (TACC, Bluetooth, USB charging) where she never had a single issue with the Fit.
If your SO must drive the Tesla at some point, it sounds like she already knows how to unlock and get it in drive. Beyond that, it's a car and drives like one would expect.
My wife dislikes the S. She likes driving the 3. Finds it better than our BMW and Acura that we sold.
My mother hates both 3 & S - but she's happy driving her BMW X3 that she cannot figure out how to use the map or any of the controls.
Whatever makes someone happy.
My mother hates both 3 & S - but she's happy driving her BMW X3 that she cannot figure out how to use the map or any of the controls.
Whatever makes someone happy.
jbuenavides
Member
Most of the woman that I know really loves driving Tesla car, but then again we all have different preference even with cars.
My wife is not alone on this. Even though I’m an engineer, I find the Model 3 a lot of work to drive ... and some of the time a real pain in the neck. There’s just so much overhead to have to go through to get this thing, this computer on wheels, on the road.
I have quite a few decades under my belt and I don't remember things as well as in my flaming youth. Plus, I'm retired and don't need to drive every day. Bottom line, it's a complicated thing to drive with all its multi-function controls. I don’t know if I’ll ever develop enough muscle memory to be able to just hop in and drive off.
Compared to sliding into my old Toyota, turning the key and just get going, it's an event to contort my way into the driver's seat, focus on the screen and finger dance around it to do the little things like adjust the cab environment or even just open the glove compartment instead of being able to accomplish most of that by touch; to twist around a time or two to see past the many pieces of the car blocking my vision; and wish I had an AM radio in this expensive car to hear the news on.
Of course, it has its compensations … I love the torque, the quiet (although the tire noise from the low-profile tires at 42 psi intrudes at any speed above crawl), and the shape of the car. I appreciate the clever engineering solutions to minimize weight while delivering safety and driving fun.
Bottom line though, I wish that, on top of the S3XY models, Elon would produce some SMPL ones for the young at heart, but old in all the other parts.
I have quite a few decades under my belt and I don't remember things as well as in my flaming youth. Plus, I'm retired and don't need to drive every day. Bottom line, it's a complicated thing to drive with all its multi-function controls. I don’t know if I’ll ever develop enough muscle memory to be able to just hop in and drive off.
Compared to sliding into my old Toyota, turning the key and just get going, it's an event to contort my way into the driver's seat, focus on the screen and finger dance around it to do the little things like adjust the cab environment or even just open the glove compartment instead of being able to accomplish most of that by touch; to twist around a time or two to see past the many pieces of the car blocking my vision; and wish I had an AM radio in this expensive car to hear the news on.
Of course, it has its compensations … I love the torque, the quiet (although the tire noise from the low-profile tires at 42 psi intrudes at any speed above crawl), and the shape of the car. I appreciate the clever engineering solutions to minimize weight while delivering safety and driving fun.
Bottom line though, I wish that, on top of the S3XY models, Elon would produce some SMPL ones for the young at heart, but old in all the other parts.
XLR82XS
D M C
100%! I've only ever known 1 women who would spend time on car forums and she was a gear-head. (RIP)
Every other female.... "what's a forum?"
larmor
Active Member
Yes have that same experience. SO hates driving our MX, says its too 'light' which confers that it is not safe-presumably this is because it is so fast and accelerates so easily. Even when she has to, she avoids driving it, our other car is a GLS 450, so in fact the switchgear is very similar. I just tell here that it is just a car. If there is some weird tesla specific thing, unlike another car, i say, think of it as a ferrari, no one complains about idiosyncrasies of a ferrari, so similarly it is an electric car and hyper fast SUV, so it will be different. Then one day, she met a former spacex employee working on the docking of dragon, and that person went on and on complaining that Elon is a PITA. Then quickly added is going to a startup, space related-- to which i said, probably got into a space startup based on experience at spacex, and fwiw steve jobs was a PITA.
In any case it is a good study to understand her complaints on the MX, and will take time to adopt, but i'm sure if gas prices rise, she will switch to the MX very fast.
powaking
Member
My wife can't wait to sit her butt behind the wheel of my S. Her normal job is about 20 mins away but a couple of days a week she has a per diem gig up in the Boston area and I let her take the S on those days (I work from home so I encourage her to take it instead of having it sit in the driveway). She loves all of the attention she gets while she drives it but she also stays clear of any of the techy stuff of the car. Doesn't like TACC even in bumper to bumper (makes her car sick) and doesn't use AP as she rather drive it herself (can't blame her on that). Otherwise she loves driving it.
Watts_Up
Well-Known Member
Just get her the new Porsche Taycan Turbo S, I doubt she will not like it....My Wife Doesn't Like Driving my Tesla
Note: I'm not a Porsche fan, but I think it's just a little bit of cognitive dissonance attitude...
Or just take her for a test drive when the Porsche will be available,
and then let her agree that the Tesla are much more fun for a lesser price...
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Akikiki
A'-Lo-HA ! y'all
Bill Price
Active Member
I have NEVER asked myself this question.
This has never happened to me.
Am I the only one who knows how to adjust their rearview mirrors so that you don't have blind spots?
RFernatt
Solar/EV Owner/Enthusiast
My wife doesn't care for the Tesla either. Too much tech, controls too different from other vehicles, etc. She hates the way AP drives (and in certain areas, she's not wrong). Basically, if you're a techie, you can appreciate what goes into the car and love the differences, value its uniqueness. If you're not, then it's just a bunch of unnecessary stuff to learn to do differently for no apparent benefit for the mundane task of driving from point A to point B. In that way, it's intimidating to her.
I did make her drive it a couple times just so she knows how if she ever had to. So, she know how to get in with the key card, use basic driving controls, and how to charge it. But, that was the extent of her interest.
I did make her drive it a couple times just so she knows how if she ever had to. So, she know how to get in with the key card, use basic driving controls, and how to charge it. But, that was the extent of her interest.
Oldschool496
Member
You have never skinned the bottom of your car if it has suspension? Then your driving a car with springs.
I'm not talking about it happening to you? Im talking about it happening to someone who might not know what the other stalk is.
Also on older P85s its a known thing for veterans of Tesla's to engage AP because its in the wrong position with relation to newer cars, causing undue/unintended acceleration.
Not talking about the mirrors, talking about looking over your right shoulder briefly to make sure, as one should.
Quit going around this sight looking for a fight also. Its not becoming of you. Stay in your lane.
Bill Price
Active Member
Wrong!
One never need look over one's shoulder if one has no blind spots like me.
I am in my lane, old timer. Not looking for a fight at all. It's sad that you think so. You might look a lot better without that chip on your shoulder?
I wish I had this problem.
My wife has basically taken my model 3 as her car and left me with her Acura MDX. I still get to drive it on the weekends though!
My wife has basically taken my model 3 as her car and left me with her Acura MDX. I still get to drive it on the weekends though!
Oldschool496
Member
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