Welcome to Tesla Motors Club
Discuss Tesla's Model S, Model 3, Model X, Model Y, Cybertruck, Roadster and More.
Register

Need Help Convincing Spouse To Buy

Notable_Noah

Member
Aug 28, 2021
11
7
South Carolina
If she’s going to limit all purchases to companies with CEO’s who aren’t asses she’s going to be living off the land.
Bahahaha this one made me chuckle. You're not wrong at all!!! We actually talked about this a little and I plan on bringing it up again. Some CEOs are nice and do things with well-meaning in their plans, but most big company CEOs I have looked into so far have some dirt on them that isn't good. I will be restating this point to her for sure!
 
  • Like
Reactions: hcdavis3

Notable_Noah

Member
Aug 28, 2021
11
7
South Carolina
‘Perhaps you can do some research into the psychological depths to find out what's really behind it.”
——-

This^^^^

Obviously some other stuff going on here. I‘d bet there are a lot of things bought by people who claim these kinds of “reservations,“ from companies headed by people far worse than Musk. These kinds of policies can put a serious cramp in your purchasing patterns to say the least.
I agree wholeheartedly here. I'm hoping to talk more with her about her ideals here and there and try to find the roots!
 

Merrill

Merrill
Jan 23, 2013
4,070
1,555
Sonoma, California
No matter what you think of Elon, he is very smart and who else could pull off starting an all electric car company from the ground up. He has been a major reason that other manufacturers are now making all electric cars. Also look at what else he has done with all his other companies. You have to keep in mind that any brilliant person has issues, they are in another world.
 

Notable_Noah

Member
Aug 28, 2021
11
7
South Carolina
That "excuse" is masquerading for some other reservation, unless she also made that determination for the fridge you have in your kitchen, or the company that built the house you live in, and she never ever orders anything from any large online company like amazon, home depot, bestbuy, or any other large company,.

The short answer is "dont" (bother trying). That is a COMPLETE no win situation for you, OP. Even if you eventually buy the car, EVERY ...SINGLE...LITTLE ....THING that happens with the car will be a referendum on "I didnt want this thing anyway, why did you make us get it?".

Dont bother, no purchase is worth that kind of heartache that WILL happen, provided this is a real story and not a first post to "get conversation going".
She was the first to bring up the fact that if I get it, she will build resentment, and if I get a different car, I will build resentment. It's certainly a tough situation... :(

Getting a Tesla has been my dream since 2012 though... so it's difficult unravelling all of that and buying a different EV for about the same amount of money that isn't as objectively as good as a Tesla.

This is my first experience with a financial decision that could have lasting impacts on my relationship, and it just makes it more difficult that it's about my Tesla Dream of almost 10 years. I'm hoping we can talk more about it and find a solution that leaves neither of us with resentment. Thank you for your reply!
 

jjrandorin

Moderator, Model 3, Tesla Energy Forums
Nov 28, 2018
11,424
13,299
Riverside Co. CA
She was the first to bring up the fact that if I get it, she will build resentment, and if I get a different car, I will build resentment. It's certainly a tough situation... :(

Getting a Tesla has been my dream since 2012 though... so it's difficult unravelling all of that and buying a different EV for about the same amount of money that isn't as objectively as good as a Tesla.

This is my first experience with a financial decision that could have lasting impacts on my relationship, and it just makes it more difficult that it's about my Tesla Dream of almost 10 years. I'm hoping we can talk more about it and find a solution that leaves neither of us with resentment. Thank you for your reply!

Perhaps, since its your dream for your car, she has her dream car she wants? My wife had a dream of having a BMW X5. We only have 1 child, and that child was in highschool at the time (and we did not host lots of people, etc). there was absolutely no "need" for a vehicle that large, but it was a dream she had of having that vehicle.

We had been BMW drivers for 15 years at that point, but 3, 4 and 5 series vehicles. I didnt think we "needed" it in the slightest, but neither did I "need" the 435 M sport with power and sound kit that I had at the time, either. I figured out a way to make it happen, even though it was stretching a bit to do so. She drove it for 3 years on a lease, and said "its too big" but she was happy to have tried one, and even though I didnt think we needed it, it was her dream.

Life partners shouldnt shut down each others dreams about "mundane" stuff like cars, even if its not practical or the other partner doesnt like it, unless it truly impacts the family (too expensive, corvette as a main vehicle for a family of 5, etc).

Purchasing a car is not endorsing the lifestyle of the CEO of the company. Its buying a vehicle. /shrug...

Ill climb down off my soap box now.
 

alexgr

Active Member
Aug 13, 2019
1,183
1,197
42
The short of it is my spouse loves everything about the Tesla cars, BUT she absolutely can't stand Elon Musk, his business practices, personal beliefs, how he treats his employees, lack of charity work, and global actions. She doesn't want to even have a Tesla car be in our driveway. She hates the idea of supporting a company he runs. I'm trying to think of good points that make buying a Tesla so attractive that the fact Elon Musk can be a terrible human being irrelevant. Any and all advice is welcomed!

My best,
Noah
1. Replace wife.
2. If 1 doesn't work, research whatever car she drives. Ford - Nazi inspiration, GM - a gang of oil and gas lobbyists, Chrysler/Doge - Fiat Italian mafia company. Toyota - working hard to stop progress and the only company that average fleet mpg goes down. etc. you got the idea. She'll buy Tesla or will ride a bicycle.
 
  • Like
Reactions: WhiteWi

cwerdna

Active Member
Jul 11, 2012
3,730
2,812
SF Bay Area, CA
The idea of buying a different EV is tough for me because it's been my dream since 2012. I have so much emotion behind all of the objective reasons why a Tesla is my dream car :(

BUT I am open to the idea, and did a rudimentary search of other like-priced EVs last night at work on my off time and found possible replacements, if not as objectively good as a Tesla. I do really appreciate the reminder the check out the federal tax incentives!
Yes, part of pointing you to Federal Tax Credits for Electric and Plug-in Hybrid Cars was not only the Federal tax credit but it also was a centralized location to find all the BEVs that are shipping (some previously shipped) in the US. Unfortunately, some area CARB emission state only (+ possibly a few more) and not a choice outside them.

I'm in CA, so we have all of them, thanks to the CA ZEV program (CARB Mandate For Zero Emission Vehicles).
 
  • Like
Reactions: Notable_Noah

hgmichna

Member
Jun 17, 2020
337
269
Germany
Lots of good ideas in this thread. Here are two more.
  1. Tell her (once more) that a Tesla has been your big wish for almost a decade and ask her if she would really want to veto it. Perhaps she'll end up saying that she doesn't like it but will not go as far as a veto.
  2. Inquire how she came to the conclusion that Elon Musk is a bad person. Dig into it. Reject hearsay. This, by the way, is a good tactic for many anti-electro accusations, because very often one finds that the accusers have no basis.
 

donandersonjr

Member
May 10, 2021
70
204
Boston
Tesla needs to do a better job marketing to women. At least for my wife, having thousands of male over hyped you tubers all focusing on how fast the car will go is not a plus. She also puts Tesla in the ev bucket with the cars that need hours to charge after 40 miles of driving.
 

thesmokingman

Member
Jun 21, 2021
816
1,608
Socal
The short of it is my spouse loves everything about the Tesla cars, BUT she absolutely can't stand Elon Musk, his business practices, personal beliefs, how he treats his employees, lack of charity work, and global actions. She doesn't want to even have a Tesla car be in our driveway. She hates the idea of supporting a company he runs. I'm trying to think of good points that make buying a Tesla so attractive that the fact Elon Musk can be a terrible human being irrelevant. Any and all advice is welcomed!

My best,
Noah
That is weird. Tesla employees voted against going union because they love where they are. Does she realize this, any idea of how many millionaires they've made? Musk is kind of weird, but really smart ppl generally are, lmao.


Tesla is offering stock options and grants as part of its compensation packages. But unlike most automakers, the company is offering stock compensations for all employees throughout the organization, including production associates and sales staff, which is rare in the auto industry.
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: uujjj2 and WhiteWi

tkizzy

Member
Jun 8, 2015
219
93
Napa, CA
She was the first to bring up the fact that if I get it, she will build resentment, and if I get a different car, I will build resentment. It's certainly a tough situation... :(

Getting a Tesla has been my dream since 2012 though... so it's difficult unravelling all of that and buying a different EV for about the same amount of money that isn't as objectively as good as a Tesla.

This is my first experience with a financial decision that could have lasting impacts on my relationship, and it just makes it more difficult that it's about my Tesla Dream of almost 10 years. I'm hoping we can talk more about it and find a solution that leaves neither of us with resentment. Thank you for your reply!
Sounds like there might be a lack of education on the subject. Maybe slowly introduce pieces of the puzzle bit by bit, and eventually the history books will be on your side. But before then when her myopic rage has been channeled elsewhere, will be less resentment
 

Products we're discussing on TMC...

About Us

Formed in 2006, Tesla Motors Club (TMC) was the first independent online Tesla community. Today it remains the largest and most dynamic community of Tesla enthusiasts. Learn more.

Do you value your experience at TMC? Consider becoming a Supporting Member of Tesla Motors Club. As a thank you for your contribution, you'll get nearly no ads in the Community and Groups sections. Additional perks are available depending on the level of contribution. Please visit the Account Upgrades page for more details.


SUPPORT TMC
Top