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NEWSBREAK: Tesla causing a New Medical Condition.

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by rogbmw, Apr 12, 2013.

  1. rogbmw

    rogbmw Member

    Feb 10, 2012
    Central Florida

    A new medical phenomenon is sweeping through Plastic Surgery offices through the United States. First diagnosed in 2012, Physicians and Plastic Surgeons in particular have noticed a new medical condition, and have named it TESLAITIS. The predominant diagnostic feature is a permanent upturning of the outer edges of the lips, resulting in increased wrinkles at the outer surface of the eyes and mid-facial region. This was first noticed in Southern California, and has spread throughout the United States. There are scattered reports that this condition has recently been diagnosed in Canada, with an occasional confirmed cases noted in Europe, especially in Scandinavian Countries. These areas have been warned that an increase in the number of confirmed TESLAITIS cases is coming, with the medical community conducting conferences on possible cures.

    In the United States Journal of External Bliss Medicine, treatments have been discussed, but unsatisfactory results are being obtained. They include regular injections of Botox into the areas above the outer margins of the Orbicularis Oris muscle (the muscle surrounding the mouth) to prevent the upturned outside edges of the mouth, and injections into areas lateral (outside) to the eyes to diminish "Crows Feet" as a result of the constantly upturned smile line. Even more radical treatments have been suggested such as ICE procedures (not the cold kind, but driving a conventional internal combustion driven form of personal transportation), but this has lead to its own phenomenon and has resulted in just the opposite effect of TESLAITIS with the ultimate prognosis of protracted downturn of the outside edges of the lower lip. This result has had positive effects on the "Crows Feet", but the overall mental status of patients undergoing ICE treatment has deteriorated to the point that this particular treatment has been discontinued.

    If you see this condition, please notify the proper authorities, but be careful as the condition can be difficult to hear coming because of its quiet nature, which is another one of the diagnostic characteristics.

    I have been diagnosed with TESLAITIS.
  2. Zextraterrestrial

    Mar 11, 2010
    Humboldt/Los Altos
    I'm getting Tesla Wrinkles on my face and this stupid grin is stuck - like so - :biggrin:
  3. eAdopter

    eAdopter Member

    Mar 11, 2013
    Bellevue, WA
    Yes, those of us working in the medical field are seeing more of this trend. We're replacing the old diagnosis code (ICD-9) of 780.4 (Dizziness and Giddiness) with a new code. The old code worked well for reservation holders (Dizziness) and deliveries (Giddiness) but now Telsaitis will require a new ICD-9 or ICD-10 code. For some reason, companies such as Ford, GM, and others are lobbying Congress to exclude related treatments from mandatory healthcare benefits.
  4. Merrill

    Merrill Active Member

    Jan 23, 2013
    Sonoma, California
    So that's my problem, gosh it feels good to finally know what has happened to me in the last few months: Teslaitis!!!!!
  5. ThortsMD

    ThortsMD Member

    Nov 30, 2012
    How about using the ICD-9 code 293.13: Severe recurrent mania without psychosis? That about covers it, I think!
  6. Iz

    Iz EVs are here to stay

    Nov 22, 2006
    New York
    I have it too. Seems we are all going off the deep end.

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