I always felt that being an early adaptor was risky but that was tempered for me by Tesla's customer focus, over the air updates, prepaid service for "hardware updates", premium brand, etc. etc. I thought Tesla would likely provide an upgrade path (prorated or low cost---not "free") especially for the Sig Model S but I was wrong.
I don't believe Tesla ever intended to provide free "hardware upgrades" in terms of new features. Rather, I would expect changes to be implemented that affect the reliability and/or mechanical performance of the vehicle.
That is what they did for Roadster. I didn't get the improved cosmetics when they released the V2.5, and I certainly didn't expect it (they did offer it as paid upgrade, albeit expensive). But I did get two free upgrades to the cooling system, which replaced substantial components in the car.
Upgrading 3,000 battery packs - $12 million
You dropped a zero. It's more like $120 million. I'm not expecting them to spend that kind of money. It's not reasonable.
Look, they screwed up, mainly and especially on the communications. They can't really fix it. Time to move on.