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Stopping at traffic lights: P, N or (H)

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For ICE cars, putting into N at traffics light reduce wear on your clutch disc (which was made with asbestos in the past and called clutch asbestos). It is a consumable parts in a car with multiple gear transmission. Model S don't have a transmission so that is not needed. New Japanese ICE cars often have CVT which don't have that part too.
 
The OP specifically says he wants to be able to take his foot off the brake. I think that hill hold won't help, because it only holds for two seconds.

To achieve teranceco's goal, I see only two options: put the car in park, or apply the parking brake via the touch screen. With the newest software, at least you can configure the car to not extend the door handles when you put it into park.
 
According to the draft MX manual the Hold function lasts for 10 minutes and changes to Park after that. No need to hold the brake pedal or shift.

To disengage Vehicle Hold, press the
accelerator pedal or press and release the
brake pedal. Shifting into Neutral also releases
Vehicle Hold.
Note: After actively braking Model X for
approximately 10 minutes, Model X shifts into
Park and Vehicle Hold cancels. Model X also
shifts into Park if it detects that the driver has
left the vehicle.