=====FINAL UPDATE =====
I am very happy to say that as of today the above nightmare scenario of having to wait another 8 weeks did not come to pass, and I have received all of my money back, including all refunds of deposits, loan repayment, etc etc.
I thank all of you for your support through this ordeal (which it truly was, I haven't had a car for almost... two months now?). I had created this account specifically to air my grievances about this particular purchase, and since it has all been resolved in the end, I will go back to my slumber.
Good to hear that you can finally move on from this fiasco. Have you figured out what vehicle you're going to get?