That brings up an interesting point, does your P85+ have autopilot? There were only 300 P85+ cars that were made after AP hardware was released, it was cancelled at the same time so only a handful made it out. You should register your car with the 300, it's a unicorn and worth more as people do look for RWD P models with the + suspension and AP, and there aren't many available. Your car would have been manufactured in November 2014 if it was the last P85+ ever produced. This is also why you have 3G radio; you can upgrade to LTE but it wasn't available on the older cars like ours, the first LTE hardware was delivered in June 2015.
You're complainin g about Tesla lacking hardware on all cars when your car was built - it had what it had, nobody was surprised about that. What's bad is 3 year old cars like ours are now being excluded from software updates for no reason - that's closer to Apple's philosophy of forced obsolescence than simply newer hardware being released which is what every manufacturer in every industry does.
He's probably right about his cold range numbers. I have a lead foot too, and my range drops a lot in Chicago winters. It's not impossible that wallaby has an even more heavy foot and keeps the staggers on in snow. The P85+ is the least efficient Model S ever made, and it doesn't get better when you drive it inefficiently. I have a similar issue in my Porsche as well, though AWD helps I still get half the MPG in cold that I do in summer. Cold impacts range, but driver impacts it more.