Wondering if OP has had "issues" with previous loaners. I got an Enterprise loaner, valet to me... took all of 2 minutes. No fuss, no muss.
It was made clear to me that this wasn't because they were short on Model S's, or that this new policy applied to everyone. It was explained to me that "We are no longer giving Roadster owners Model S loaners."
I'm not asking to be treated differently than other customers; I'm asking to be treated the same.
Getting a Model S loaner takes 5 minutes. "Here's my keys, here's your keys, sign here, have a nice day. We'll call you when your car is done."
The Enterprise desk is not on-site. You have to wait around for them to call Enterprise, for Enterprise to get around to driving down there, driving you back to the Enterprise office, waiting in line, giving them all of your personal information (that Tesla already has), giving your credit card information to them (because you can't be trusted), and having to turn down the sales pitch for the "upgraded insurance coverage". If everything falls into place, this takes 45 minutes.
If you think those two things are the same...well, I'm really not sure what else to say.
I, too, have an extra car. However, what I don't have is someone to meet me at the service center. I've made arrangements for them to pick up the car at my home but, it's being done on THEIR schedule, not mine. I have to take time off of work to do this.
I have grown up. You should, too.