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edschifman
Last Activity:
Nov 15, 2016 at 1:22 PM
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Location:
Naples, Florida
Occupation:
President of Veco Holdings, LLC

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edschifman

Member, from Naples, Florida

edschifman was last seen:
Nov 15, 2016
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  • About

    Location:
    Naples, Florida
    Occupation:
    President of Veco Holdings, LLC
    I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees; I write award-winning operas; I manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row.

    I woo women with my sensuous and god-like trombone playing; I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed; and I cook Thirty-Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.

    Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello, I was scouted by the Mets, and I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang-gliding. On Wednesdays, after work, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.

    I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and have won weekend passes to Branson. Last summer I toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. I bat .400. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. Children trust me.

    I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me.

    I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago, I discovered the meaning of life, but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four-course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven. I breed prize-winning clams. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis.

    BFA Industrial Design-1972-University of Kansas
    MBA Marketing-1978-University of Cincinnati
    MBA Marketing for Technology Ventures-2000-Harvard Business School

    President and CEO of Interconnect Devices for 23 years-sold
    Investor in real estate, rail car leasing, aircraft leasing, and technology startups

    History, photography, travel, cars

    Signature

    Black, gray interior, carbon, 21 inch wheels, every option except rear seats.
    FLORIDA TESLA ENTHUSIASTS