To charge:
So walk up, if asleep click boot release (under boot lid), if not push charger flap and plug in.
I believe this is correct, for modern vehicles (but not for older Model S).
To unplug:
walk up, click boot release (under boot lid) to wake it up, unplug.
I don't think this is right. The car can be awake and still charging (or still drawing power from the chargepoint to run heating etc. even if charging as such is finished - which is the normal case when parked, awake and plugged in). So you need to command it to stop charging and unlock the plug before you can pull it out. With Model S at least, even after you've unlocked it, if you wait a while before unplugging it will lock up again and resume drawing power.