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Can't run service mode battery health check without internet connection?

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So I prepped all week to run the battery health test before a big weekend trip, and I keep getting this message. The car is at 30% SoC, should be fine to run the test.

It seems quite obviously to be some sort of connectivity issue with the server? But I have so many questions:

1. I DO have internet where the car is parked, but it's a bit slow. This timeout seems super aggressive and/or just plain wrong.

2. Why does this require an internet connection at all?

Very very annoying. Not sure there's a plausible workaround for this.

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I rebooted the car and the test started right up. However, I'm not sure it's actually burning off energy like it's supposed to. Will give it some time...
OK yeah ... this is definitely not working. Blew a few hours on this.

I can start the test but it never seems to ACTUALLY start. I never see the Test In Progress indicator on the HV system screen or hear the heater and fans running to burn energy. I suspect this is due to my charger being 200V/30A, which is right on the edge of the 6 kW charger the test says it requires ... and it may also be due to the specifics of the charger, which is a load shared charger that dynamically adjusts the available power and ratchets down the upper limit when charging stops or slows down.