That's how it's supposed to work, and how mine has always worked. To discharge from the batteries, you must reduce reserve below 100%. To charge the batteries past solar provision, you must set Backup mode.
We still want more fine grained control. But in your case, I think it is also a misunderstanding of Tesla's limited number of modes. I believe this is a symptom of Tesla trying to oversimplify things and therefore not tell everyone everything, in the fear of less "trained" people asking too many questions and being confused. I think this is a mistake: lack of information, incorrect language use, and lack of control, make it harder for everyone to understand, not easier. If there was full control, correct language use (by Tesla's app), and full information, then the only support that would need to be done would be to the extremely "poorly trained" people, and in that case, we could give simple instructions that they can follow that would not be at all hard for them to do.