For 1, you should never start the generator first before going to connect it in for that reason. And for the other, having exposed prongs on a house outlet connected to a live circuit would be deadly, so I couldn't picture that happening.
So I just did some searching for generator input receptacles, and I see what is available, and why it makes sense to me and to you. They don't make them with exposed prongs. They are male, but all generator input receptacles are sold as boxes with spring loaded flip-down covers to keep the prongs covered all the time, so they are not exposed. Now that makes sense and satisfies all of the needed safety conditions.