That's the thing - it IS an official retrofit outside of China now, only not for cars with a white CAN bus connector, because whatever loom they've created for this retrofit kit is made for the later one that was blue.You’re fighting a losing battle if you try to get Tesla to retrofit this. It’s not something they’ve done outside of China.
In fairness they’ve been pretty consistent with this message.
To be fair to Tesla - no one knows for absolute certain that there isn't something else about the pre-late 2019 cars that makes it incompatible, but it is known that this retrofit plugs into the CAN bus behind the front seats, so logically involves a Y-connector splicing the new hardware into the car.