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The Tesla way (or how to be weird without even trying)

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Active Member
Jul 1, 2019
mid wales
Regular readers will know my S got trailered in on Monday with collapsed suspension.
I received an email message today sent at 4.08pm telling me I have an appointment for a service visit today at 4.15 and a second message at 4.09 to remind me of that.:(:D

A simple 'sorry we've been busy but it's in the shop now' would have done

The app tells me is has been 'prepared', 'cost estimated' and is 'in service'. It also tells me that it's down to less than 20% charge and no-one has plugged it in.

In reality none of it matters 'cos I've got an identical S rental - except for the continued amazement that a company that depends on using computers makes such a pig's ear of it - which probably explains the amount of bug fix updates and poor automation.
I got a “Your car is ready for collection “ message about 3 months after my SC visit. I assumed the message should have been for someone else but was assured it was an automatic message generated when they closed the job and they were catching up with their “paperwork “!.
On my first service visit, the car was in for the day and I said that I would wait - I took myself off to Heathrow T5 to kill far too many hours in what I discovered as a very poor selection of coffee shops. All pre Covid.

As I got bored, I returned a little earlier than we had agreed, so sat in the even more boring waiting area for an hour or so. Part way through, the technician came out, apologised for running a little late and said probably another half or so. I had an app update saying new software being installed so knew it was being worked on.

Then radio silence, the service centre/showroom was eerily quiet until a text came through. Something along the lines of "we will continue to work on your car tomorrow and will contact you when you can collect". WTF. I was sitting next next door and an hour before, was told it would be ready in half hour or so. I was stuck an hour plus drive from home, close to closing time at Tesla and I had no form of transport.

So stuck my head around the corner to find a service chap sitting pretty much in the dark - I guess its Tecla's way to keep people in the dark... I showed the guy the text and he went off to investigate.

Transpires, this is how their systems work and they have no way to communicate that only part of the items on the work sheet were complete but car was ready to collect. Clearly a human could have proactively communicated this, but Tesla being a so called tech company, they want the tech do the communications.

An interesting chat followed with the service guy. Its clear that staff don't like being excluded from the human interaction.

What worried me most is the tech guy didn't know I was there. Had I not gone looking for someone, I could easily imagined them closing up with me still there. I guess I could have lived off their Lotus biscuits and awful coffee.
My worst service visit was one of their demands I rock up at 8.15 am - was a half day job. To get there for that time i have to get up at 4.00am to sort myself out before leaving 6.00 am and hope not to get stuck in B'ham traffic.
I get there more or less on time and sit/wait and link in to their boradband to watch crappy old films. A hour later I'm told that mine won't be started until after lunch 'cos the techs started something else first.
I bundled up all the seat cushions, made a nice bed on the floor, filled up on biccies and cereal bars (back when the selection was good) and stuck my head down for a kip.
Funnily an hour later i get offered a loaner and come back a day or too later to pick mine up when all is done!

Having been through that I now always ring re service stuff, discuss with one of the nice front staff, explain I'm going to need a loaner unless they're prompt and I don't want a morning appt unless I can drop off the evening before...
Similar here. I had a simple wing mirror replacement job which I was informed would be done while I waited. Dropped the car off, reported to reception, shown to the waiting room. From there on in every single communication was via the app and email even though the receptionist was next door and the technician was in the adjacent workshop!
I had a good experience on my latest trip to Brooklands. Loan car arranged in advance but when I got there I asked how quickly they could do the job as if it wasn’t too long, I’d wait while they did it to avoid the hassle and waste of time sorting loaner and extra driving back and forth. So I sat at the high table alone with my mask on, worked, joined a meeting. Job finished before my meeting. Carried on with my meeting then back home with my own car. Happy customer on that occasion. Don’t get me started on broken Tesla home charger!
My experience was equally bizar. I collected my car in mid September 2020 & noticed the offside rear lights were misted so i booked a service call for October, no mobile service was available.
I arrived on time at 9.00 am & told about an hour so i decided to go for walk & visited the nearby McDs for a coffee. I phoned about an hour later to be told they hadnt started it so give then another couple of hours..... At 4.00 pm I walked back to discover it still wasn't ready & was asked to wait in the waiting room & help myself to a coffee & biscuits.
I complained about the awful service & said i would have had a loaner if I'd known it was going to take all day. It was eventually ready at a few minutes to 5pm. Now here comes the twist.
Two days later i get a text telling me my car is ready for collection and could i return the loaner & since they hadn't got a record which model car had I loaned!
February 19 I dropped my car off at Park Royal for a rear screen replacement. They gave me an unlocked loaner 100D which was nice.

My wife gave birth to our son the day before I was to pick my car up. Tesla offered to drive my car from Park Royal to the New Forest. Which they did at 7pm in the eve. I think they could tell I was tired when they called.

It seems like it's a mixed bag what service you receive!
I've always had good service at Heathrow/WestDrayton. Took the car in to fix a rattle, took them a day to start then I could see them do about 6 test drives, then a text to tell me that they are still working on it, the next day another 5 drives then a text saying they thought they fixed it but when it was QA tested the issue was still there, day3 another 4 drives then I get a text to collect.

It doesn't rattle now, and I'm impressed that they were really doing something and had QA processes in place to make sure. Communication via text was clear and useful,
I brought mine back into the SC between XMas and New year to get the side camera replaced and a few other small bits and pieces done. When they told me it was ready I walked out and the first thing that I saw was the camera hanging off the side of the car. They had replaced it but not bothered to install it into the panel. Back into the garage it went and I collected about an hour later.

About two weeks later I got a text from them telling me that their remote diagnosis had detected that the same camera wasn't working and how it could be repaired by a mobile Ranger.

Strange how they couldn't detect the problem when the camera wasn't working, but could detect a fault when the camera was working fine.