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Twas the Night Before Configuration or Account of a Visit from St. Elon

Discussion in 'Model X' started by Cattledog, Aug 30, 2015.

  1. Cattledog

    Cattledog Active Member

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    #1 Cattledog, Aug 30, 2015
    Last edited: Aug 30, 2015
    Twas the Night Before Xmas or Account of a Visit from St. Elon

    'Twas the night 'for Xmas and all through the forum,
    The posters were antsy, they'd thrown out decorum!

    Their stocks had gone up at the end of last week,
    In the hopes that St. Elon would send out a Tweet.

    The Res. holders were nestled all snug in their beds,
    While visions of falcon wings danced in their heads.

    While Bonnie in her Roadster and Nigel in his 'S',
    Had just settled down to let their fingers rest.

    When over at Fremont there arose such a clatter,
    A new thread was started to discuss what was the matter.

    LED headlights started to flash,
    And v7.0 appeared on the dash!

    The moonlight at Hawthorne started to show,
    That the launch of this next model was 'all systems go'.

    When what to our wondering eyes did appear,
    But the new Model X! This was no mule, dear.

    With a wing-walking driver, no way Exxon's pawn,
    We knew in a moment this must be Elon!

    More rapid than falcons this SUV came,
    And he laughed and joked and called it 'Insane':

    Now JB, now Deepak, now Franz and Chris Porritt!
    On Diarmuid, on Jerome and George B. before it,

    To the top of the sales charts, to to the ships in the ports!
    get cars to customers, (and Consumer Reports)!

    As blurry videos showed before the car was yet driven,
    The 'X' is amazing, delays are forgiven!

    So out to the Founders and showrooms they flew,
    Went trucks full of Xs and Elon went too!

    And then, in the media, we heard with a cheer,
    Motor Trend, once again, said 'Car of the Year'!

    As we checked on our status, and deliv. date projections,
    Elon streamed a reveal that showed all the options!

    He was dressed all in black, clothes Talulah had picked,
    And we swear his sunglasses were electrochromic!

    Purchase agreements, he had in a stack,
    Those old auto dealers were taken aback!

    His projections, how they fluttered, and while recently wary,
    50,000 deliveries did not seem so scary,

    With autonomous here, and a little more code,
    The Model X would have its own 'Ludicrous' mode.

    The second row seats, how they swivel to greet,
    And a titanium shield still lurks beneath,

    The nose has a cone and the rear can tow plenty,
    And with a big battery pack it exceeds 120.

    It was stylish and sleek, an SUMV*,
    We all knew the servers would blow at TMC.

    This is the future, we're all into EVs,
    And it gave us a great hope for the new Model 3s.

    We are grateful for Tesla and all their great work,
    Ignore Holman Jenkins, the miserable jerk.

    So here's to the Founders and Signatures too,
    Powerwall, Powerpack and Gig Factory 2.

    Elon sprang to the Hyperloop, SpaceX had a countdown,
    There's a lot on his plate, don't let it get him down,

    But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
    "Solar panels to all, let's be powered by light".

    *SUMV = Sports Utility Mini Van
     
  2. anticitizen13.7

    anticitizen13.7 Enemy of the Status Quo

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    :biggrin:

    The humor is always appreciated in these tense times before launch day! Thanks!
     
  3. bonnie

    bonnie Oil is for sissies.

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    Tweeted link to this thread. Great job, Cattledog!
     
  4. Hugh Mannity

    Hugh Mannity Mediocre Member

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    ha ha ha very nice man! here's hoping we do hear something tomorrow!
     
  5. jtg

    jtg Member

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    That was the best yet. For all of us waiting, Thanks!
     
  6. Crowded Mind

    Crowded Mind Member

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    Amazing. But how does this thread not include "Xmas"?
     
  7. aznt1217

    aznt1217 Active Member

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    Damn bonnie is posting and this is borderline poetry....
     
  8. ModelX

    ModelX Member

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    Love it!
     
  9. pmadflyer

    pmadflyer Member

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    Excellent!
     
  10. Cattledog

    Cattledog Active Member

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    Good point! Done!
     
  11. Cosmacelf

    Cosmacelf Active Member

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    Awesome. But wait, has it all just been a dream? Is the configurator, actually not up yet?
     
  12. Auzie

    Auzie Tree Hugger Member

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    Cattledog, kudos for mastering the best way to capture the spirit on TMC, in anticipation of X

    Sometimes it has to be the poetry, words are not enough

    Words are not enough
    To show the way I feel about you
    Though the times might get rough
    I know that I will always want you
    Times gone by, I never knew
    What a Model X could really do
    People say love
    just comes and goes
    But with Model X
    This never could be true...
    Time is not long enough
    To drive all the roads I want to drive
    So I'm gonna make sure that I spend my time
    Driving my Tesla, driving my Tesla

    My Model X, you're the fire that heats my soul
    The warmth you give could never grow cold
    I don't know how long we'll last
    As long as you're here, that's all I ask
    The words are not enough
    To show the way
    I feel about you
    Though the times might get rough
    I know that
    I-I-I-I, will always want you...
    Ooh-ooh, you're the fire that heats my
    sou-oul
    The warmth you give could never grow co-old
    I don't know how long
    we'll last
    As long as you're here, that's all I ask
    (You're the fire)
    You're the fire that heats my sou-oul
    The warmth you give could never grow
    co-old (never grow cold)
    I don't know how long we'll last
    As long as you're here, that's all I ask
    (You're the fire) you're the fire that heats my
    soul (warms my soul)
    The warmth you give could never grow co-old
    (I don't know) I don't know how long we'll last
    As long as you're here that's all I ask
    (Oh that's you) You're the fire that heats my soul (warms my soul)
    [fade]
     
  13. rmzigmund

    rmzigmund Member

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    This is fantastic!
     
  14. Gwgan

    Gwgan Almost a wagon

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    Thanks! That's awesome
     
  15. Lyon

    Lyon 2016 S P100DL, 2016 X P90D

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    Dude, not cool, not everyone celebrates christmas.









    Just kidding.
     
  16. ecarfan

    ecarfan Well-Known Member

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    #16 ecarfan, Aug 30, 2015
    Last edited: Aug 31, 2015
    Cattledog, my wife and I were in hysterics reading your poem! We regularly refer to Musk -- tongue in cheek -- as "St. Elon" (we're atheists). And you are forgiven for trying to rhyme "greet" and "beneath". [emoji6]
     
  17. lodenthal

    lodenthal Member

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    These are fantastic, though I think we all have too much time on our hands waiting for our cars!,,
     
  18. Majerus

    Majerus Member

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    Is there speculation tomorrow is a launch day?
     
  19. Cosmacelf

    Cosmacelf Active Member

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    Pretty much every day, there is speculation that tomorrow is launch day. But tomorrow is a special speculative day since it is the last day in August and Elon did say the configurator would be up by the end of August (I think).
     
  20. Cattledog

    Cattledog Active Member

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    So true. I had airplane time today and had finished my other work, so I just started going and had fun with it.
     

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