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Model 3 or 2013 Model S

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I think generally autopilot tips the scales in favor of the Model 3. To say for sure, you ought to tell us what trims of both cars you are considering. I.e., a mid-range Model 3 versus a P85 Model S. Depending on what those are, one may offer more performance than the other. Certainly the S is bigger, if that is a concern/desire. Also, whether the S is a CPO that offers a full CPO warranty is important. And remember no tax credit on the S, either.
 
I went back and forth agonizing between Model 3 and CPO Model S. There are so many great CPO deals out there now, I don't think you can go wrong either way. I would be sure to get one under 50k miles so you get the 4 yr/50K mile warranty if you go that route.

In the end I am super happy I chose the Model 3. To me it's the best car ever, and there is something special about a brand new Tesla. Not ruling out getting a used Model S down the road sometime though.
 
Personal choice: Size, driving experience, etc.

My personal choice would be the Model 3 ... even vs. a 2018 Model S, if it were the same price. So much more fun to drive. So much better forward visibility. So much easier to see speedo without steering wheel in way. So much better HVAC vent system. So much fresher, cleaner, and more modern an interior feel, with fewer stalks, buttons, etc. Noticeably faster Supercharging (not in kW, but in miles/minute).
 
Have the option of getting a new model 3 or a 2013 Model S with 18k miles. Both around the same price. I’m going back and forth, what do you think? Pros/cons?

It mainly depends upon your taste & liking. Model S is lots bigger and spacious compared to a Model-3. But, it may lack a lot of new software features that Model-3 has.

It now all comes down to pricing, as you are saying that it will cost around the same, then it's a 'no-brainer' to go for Model-3, unless you prefer a bigger spacious car like Model-S. Also, a brand new Model-3 comes with 4 yrs full warranty & 8 yrs powertrain warranty.

Again, all depends upon your taste & liking, best of luck!!
 
We have an MS and a new Model 3. If you are chosing between the two models I think the first question is how large of a car do you need. The Model S just has a wonderful amount of cargo area (about twice that of the Model 3 in cubic feet), and that space is configured differently. Lift gates do provide you with space (in height) that you won't get in the Model 3.

Along the lines of space, if you will be having passengers regularly in the second row, I think the Model S is the more comfortable car for them. The Model 3 is a great car and still spacious, but I think the Model S is a more luxurious car for adults if they will be using both rows. I'd say the Model 3 is a sportier car to drive while not being a convertible if that feel is more important to you. If parking is an issue where you live, the Model 3 will be easier to park being a little bit smaller.

Depending on the battery configuration, you'll need to weigh which gives you more range if you think that will be a factor for you. Regular daily trips weighed against longer trips if you travel. Having more range is a nice convenience feature whether it's in frequency of needing to charge especially if you can't charge at home or in allowing you to travel further between Superchargers on a trip for example. Keep in mind most people will keep their battery between 20-80% charged. If you live in a cold (heater) or hot (AC) climate that will affect your battery range as well.

Autopilot's features, especially TACC with setting the car spacing and adjusting to the speed of the car in front of you, is nice to have. We don't happen to use our autosteer but many love it for highway driving. The Model 3 will have a newer screen, albeit it is smaller but very sharp. I personally love the the Model S large 17-inch screen. The processor speed in the Model 3 will be faster I believe. Our 3/2017 Model S has AM and FM radio, which might be important to some. The AM reception is spotty depending on where you are.

As for comfort, the seats will be different. Different bolstering, different materials. You'll find threads with differing viewpoints on comfort on both. Our Model S has the perforated leather and our seat ventilation works very well in our car. We have taken a few trips during the hot, dry California summers with black interior these past 2 years and never really felt our backs or legs on the seats perspired or felt overheated. Haven't had a chance to do any similar trips in our Model 3 but don't think the seats will "breathe" like our Model S seats. The ventilated seating was not widely available on the Model S so may not be a factor but did want to mention it. Based on our Model S experience we would have ordered it for our Model 3 if it had been available.

I love having a pano roof and being able to open it. Would have ordered one on our Model 3 if it had been available. However, it's not something everyone wants.
 
Earlier this year I was seriously considering a used 2013 Model S 60 for a very good price (low 30's) before I got my M3 invite. It even came with extended warranty. At the time I convinced myself it's all I needed. I don't have a highway commute or road trip that often so no AP was ok. The hatchback design and tremendous space was appealing. However, now I believe M3 is better car, esp if you can claim all the tax credits. The better range and efficiency, AP, faster UI, and compared to 2013 more comfortable seats. Plus, my wife doesn't like driving a large car. I do wish it was a hatchback though. If you're really talking about the same price, I would go for M3.
 
I agonized over this decision as well. A friend suggested I take the money factor out of the equation especially since they are so close in price. Then it comes down to utility and enjoyment. Tesla gave me a P100DL as an overnight loaner. Given that I was only considering a 3 rear wheel drive, the MS was obviously going to be quicker, but in all other aspects, I prefer driving the 3. The dash on the MS just seemed to be in the way. Also the steering wheel blocks my view of the speed display when I have everything set to a comfortable driving position. And finally, the handling of the 3 was just so much better. In general I like smaller cars, but I really wanted a hatchback coming from a Prius, Volt and Leaf. I would really miss that utility and that was the only reason I considered the S. On all other areas, the 3 wins. So I think we can make do with the 3. For the times we just have to have a hatch, we will have to drive one of the other cars.
 
I think the 3 for sure, it overall just seems like a much nicer car. I'd LOVE to have the screens from the S though, that's my only misgiving in the decision.

If you need the space, go with the S, you won't regret it either way. I just have no need for such a large car -- hell, even the 3 is much larger than we normally need.