Have the electrician do an actual load calculation and show you the math behind it. I did a rough one and came up with requiring 75A for your existing loads, even without adding any EVSE. If your HVAC doesn't actually specify a full 30A draw, that might bring it down enough to where they thought it was okay to use a 70A feed. You may be stuck with either 120V charging on an existing circuit, or using an electrician who's ignoring the electrical code.
If this is really the case I may have to hit the brakes on the whole thing and try to get my $2,500 back. Being limited to 120V charging isn't acceptable to me.
Upgrading the sub-panel in my garage is one thing, but if I have to upgrade the shared exterior panel **and** the main wire that runs between the exterior panel and my subpanel - forget it. Way too much work. That line runs through two the common walls of my adjoining neighbor's units. Between that and getting the HOA on board, I may as well try to negotiate peace in the Middle East.
Sigh... it's always something.