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Model S can heat my chilly garage!

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Alas, that's nigh impossible. The battery would be the most expensive part of this device, and you'd need a lot of it because it takes a lot of power to generate heat.
Correct, most portable portable power packs cannot run small space heaters because of the intense power draw. You would need to find a new way to convert electricity to heat that is somehow much more efficient.
 
Also seems like your average “room” space heater is about 1.5kW and puts out around 5,100 BTU, so is it fair to say the Tesla puts out around 20,000 BTU on paper? (Though almost certainly much less...)

A random Google search for “how much BTU to heat a room” seemed to indicate a well insulated space with no windows, concrete floor, and heated area above (living space) would require about 16,000 BTU, and I believe (while quite inefficient!) the car would’ve been capable of getting the space into the low 70s and maintained that temperature without being on full blast.

Yeah, based on this information the Tesla is putting out about 20,000 BTU's per hour, which should be ample enough to decently heat an average garage.
 
Version 1 was going to be plug-in. V2 is battery. Version 3 hovers in the garage like a quad copter.

Version 4 will be embedded in the garage floor: "Thermal Floorways".
V1 has existed for quite some time...

V3 should hover from the thermal updrafts it generates.

V4 also has existed for quite some time, though radiant floor heating is rarely installed in garages.
 
I think electric heat < gas for a while in terms of efficiency, but what do I know?!

Actually electric heat is more efficient than gas heat. Electric heat is 100% efficient... all of the incoming power is converted to heat. Gas can only get into the high 90’s at best because at least some heat will be lost with the exhaust.

However, that said, gas is typically cheaper than electricity for heating even with the small losses.
 
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This is pretty dumb, but I had to paint some stuff in the garage last night and it was pretty cold in there. (It is insulated reasonably well, but no heat or AC.)

On a whim, I opened the doors and sunroof on the Model S, cranked the heat to max, and turned on camper mode while it was charging.

I went to put the kids to bed and came back an hour later and the garage was toasty warm! No need for my old kerosine jet engine bullet heater!

I’m sure this is ridiculously inefficient and I don’t actually need heat in the garage more than a few times a year, but this was mighty convenient!

Thanks a lot for posting this tip! I just came back from a ski resort, went through a snow storm. My car was all covered with ice and snow. The temperature outside was 14 Fahrenheit (-10 Celsius). About the same inside the garage. I needed a quick way to de-ice my car. Didn’t have a portable heater. But I remembered reading this thread! Now an hour later, my garage is warm and all the ice is falling off and melting!