When I first bought an SDR Radio I was, for a short period of time, a fan boy. I quickly ceased being a fan boy because it was obvious the obsequious sycophants were being painfully naive.
I see the same thing with Tesla products, cars and solar panels. People see what supports their view and ignore everything else. You wife is spot on.
I've owned a Model 3 for just under a year. It's driving performance hasn't demonstrably gotten any better. One could argue it's gotten worse. I get the 'wanting to believe' mindset. These cars are hideously expense, and there is a heap of misinformation provided in the marketing. If they were precisely as advertised it would be phenomenal. It's not.
The car, my car, brakes at shadows, doesn't recognize joggers, still doesn't recognize a speed limit sign or traffic signs. Further, it cannot drive a straight line. Maybe that's a function of processor speed. We, those would ordered FSD, were supposed to get the FSD computer upgrade 30 min field upgrade, last Spring. Ideally, that would help with micro steering adjustments. It probably would do nothing to ignore shadows with no accompanying radar or ultrasonic confirmation.
It was announced this past Spring, as I recall, next year would usher in the Tesla robo fleet. I don't see any calculus where that is even remotely possible.
The real world is not comprised of either fanboys or haters. I do not hate the car. If I knew, in 2017, what I know now, I wouldn't have bought (ordered) it. The car is not what they advertised, especially given the price, which dropped $15k since I bought it. And, btw, that's just new car price to new car price, not adjusting for depreciation. It'll either improve dramatically very soon or it will become the new Delorean.
And, yes, it absolutely IS jerky.