Inside story short, my car was not properly sleeping. After they got it to sleep, my phone did the "Connecting ..." thing so it wasn't an immediate connect. I'll re-form my opinions after a couple days and post back
So 2 days later, I can say that the sleep mode hasn't been intrusive to my normal routine (mobile app comments aside). When I've opened the trunk first and did stuff, then disconnected the charging cable, and then got in the car, it was done booting. When I use the keyfob to unlock the car and then disconnect the cable (and hang it up), it's done booting. When I put my bag in the rear driver's side first and then go to the driver's side, it's a few seconds from being done booting. If I just jump right into the car, I have to wait -- but I use that time to buckle up and put the phone in its place, etc ... no big deal.
The app delay is more annoying. What I've been doing (when I want to pre-condition the car) is opening the app to trigger it to wake up, do something else (like use the restroom or whatever), open it again and turn on HVAC or whatever and move on. I'll probably get used to it, but it's unfortunate.