I like the Midnight Silver and the Grey Next Gen seats.
Pano and Air... I think if you end up getting Pano, you'll also want to get that tinted. It really warms up the interior of the car quite a bit.
Air... I have mixed feelings about. I like that I can raise it, but part of me wonders if I wouldn't be better off with the traditional coil suspension. I worry about the air suspension breaking in the future.
Autopilot, I can't live without it -- I had a 30 mile trip in stop and go traffic from the airport, which took 2 hours -- autopiloted nearly the entire freeway route.
To me, I really think the Ludicrous Speed Upgrade is something that you might want to consider later. Since it's a P90D, it comes with the fuse pre-installed, so all that is necessary is a software unlock from Tesla, that you can do if you need more passing speed. That said, I love the increase in acceleration is very noticable, as I have a similarly configured P85D (and added Ludicrous about a year after driving with Insane).
I got the glossy obeche, which is nice, but I like the Dark Ashwood they offer on the new ones alot more.
I'd add the CF spoiler as long as you're getting the red brake calipers.