Sorry for your losses. You make some very good points.
However, what is missing and seems to be taboo is any kind of adult conversation about what the limits are that society could/should take to eliminate every single possible COVID-19 death compared to the efforts/dollars/GDP spent to stop other deaths.
A very simple (and incomplete) example is that the lock downs have caused traffic deaths to drop about in half. That is half of ~40K deaths per year but we spend very little to stop this, relatively. And there are about a million non-fatal injuries per year in addition.
Why not just have a permanent shut down to stop all these deaths and injuries?
Please discuss in a calm manner.
If you were to assume that no vaccine ever arrives, what is the end game for all the closures and what mitigation efforts should be done going forward? We all know how the death rates are skewed to older and other factors.
There is a key difference, and where your analogy fails:
With traffic deaths there are possibly other ways to mitigate and reduce the risk (reduce speed limits, improve car safety, etc. etc.).
Right now, we have no vaccine, until recently we had no treatments that would reduce the death rate for sick patients (and the one we have is only marginal). Social distancing is literally the only weapon we have.
That is a significant difference, and one I think the proponents of releasing the restrictions either ignore or gloss over.
Note, I'm not saying keep people locked down completely, but we (the USA) have shown the entire world how NOT to do things. It has been a failure at every level, because of stubborn ignorance. Japan does not have the same restrictions, but their population wears masks when they are sick (for anything), and you have not see the same problem as here. Their population is even older, and should be more affected than us.