Well, I just got my class action settlement check for $76.13.
The lawyers got $961,018.00 plus their expenses of $14,981.95, so $976,000 total.
The 5 people that brought this lawsuit get $4800 each as a “special incentive” plus the amount each of the class members get so a little over $5000 each.
It cost Tesla $5,415,280 in cash.
So what did I get for my $76.13?
Well, I guess I’ve now sued Tesla. I like Tesla. I didn’t want to sue them. Dean Sheikh and the other 4, thanks for that.
I’ve agreed that Tesla didn’t do anything wrong. I don’t quite agree. I still think promises should be kept. I can’t complain, though. I have $76.13.
I’ve given up all rights to sue Tesla for anything to do with the autopilot system, unless it gets me into an accident, but as far as any promises they’ve made to me about the autopilot system, I have a check for $76.13, now they don’t have to deliver on any of it. I feel cheated, not by Tesla, but by Dean Sheikh and his 4 cronies.
Tesla did promise my car was capable of FSD. I guess that promise is gone too.
I know I should have opted out. I was lazy, didn’t. So now I’m right there, right with that buttmonkey five. I thought I was better than that. I’m not. It’s official. There’s the 5 and me.
The lawyers made quite a bit. That’s just what they do. They can’t help it, they’re lawyers. The 5 litigious owners got $5000 each. Tesla is out almost 5 and a half million dollars. The rest of us get a meaningless amount.
I am going to send my $76.13 to the American Cancer Society. I don’t want it. Maybe a little bit of good will come from this stupid, stupid lawsuit.